The Permission Slip 

Oopsie! I had a premature post there a little bit ago – hopefully that won’t happen again. I’m using the WordPress site on my IPad as my laptop died on me. So inconsiderate!! I just lost an entire post so I’m grabbing a sangria and starting over.  Cheers! …………

Ok, Girlfriends, I need to rant. I need to blow off a little steam and GET THIS OFF MY CHEST. I don’t want to go to carry around this angst.

So what has my panties in a twist? Take a guess……

My kids? Surprisingly no.

My X-husband, “Mr. MF-Ski”? Nope.

My boss? Ha, ha, no. He has been behaving lately.

I am not pissed about my cellulite, how the refrigerator stinks (again), the high cost of living in the Bay Area or how hard it is to find stylish walking sandals that don’t look like Grandma Wilma’s orthopaedics! 

I am breathing hard because I am FED UP. Enough already!

I have heard too many excuses; excuses like you don’t have time, you don’t have a choice, you don’t have a small waist or a big bank account…… you don’t think your opinion matters, you don’t want to rock the boat, blah, blah, blah!

You don’t want to date until you lose ten pounds. You don’t want to travel until you retire. You don’t want a new job because you don’t like change.  

…….. ………..  ………. …….   You don’t have any problem complaining though. ………that’s the part that annoys me! 

I see your heavy heart. I feel your outrage. I hear your desperation.

Your pain is very familiar to me.

Like you, I chose to play it safe. I lived surrounded by walls built by my own fear. I put everyone else and everything else first. I either numbed or distracted myself to keep from feeling anything. I blamed everyone and everything for my UN-everythingness!! 

Superwoman puts up with bullshit because she can; she’s a fictional character!!! We on the other hand are only human!

I used to live that way but I don’t do that anymore. I gave myself permission to think and act differently. I’m in no way perfect- I still slip up and indulge in a bitchfest or feel sorry for myself.  Progress not perfection, Girlfriends! 

When I was in the elementary school, I pitched an idea to my teacher. We had a trash problem on the playground and I told her that we could solve the issue if we bedazzled our trash cans.  “Let’s make it fun to throw away our trash!” ! Ok, I didn’t use the word bedazzled in 1972 but this is a true story! The project was approved. I moved ahead with my idea. The can said, “FEED ME’ and featured Lucy from The Peanuts.

Cara and her little brother Mike!!

Fear has a way of looking really attractive; like a big colorful trashcan called Lucy who eats your dreams. The more you feed the fear, they more fear grows and keeps you small. 

Fear freezes you.  

Back to the present moment……What really confuses me is why you don’t give yourself permission to think or act differently?

What’s blocking you from making a change? You are an adult. You are intelligent and capable.

You are the one RESPONSIBLE for your life. You are the ONLY ONE responsible for change.

What is holding you back? What’s the worst thing that can happen?

Girlfriend, if this resonates with you then it is time to grow a pair! It is time to clear out whatever is preventing you from signing your permission slip.

I invite you to give yourself permission to do something that you have been longing to do. Give yourself permission TODAY.

This is your loving kick in the butt to stop whining and make a change. You are not going to thrive in this life unless you take risks and sit with discomfort.

LIVE a little! Let me assure you, you are going to be alright. You have everything you need right now.

I am hopeful you will honor the dreams and desires that reside within you.  

What will you give yourself permission to do today? Write out your permission slip to make it real. “I give myself permission to (fill in the blank). Post it in the comments below. Writing it down makes it real. Telling us keeps you accountable!! 

From the heart,

Cara

©2011-2017MyGirlFriendVoice

In case you are wondering about the other things that annoy me:

1. A dear friend that had recent surgery but didn’t tell anyone. She didn’t want to bother us. Let us love on you, Girlfriend!  Accepting help is not a weakness. 

2. Mitch McConnell, The Majority Whip Weiner. Need I say more?

3. My laptop dying before I was ready to replace it! 

4. I am out of FeverTree Tonic. Just as well, there is no cabana boy to make me a cocktail.

5. Mean people.  

 

 

 

 

How Big is Your Brave?

note to self i am braveThere are certain songs that grab your attention because you think that the lyrics were either written about you or just for you.  One of those songs is “BRAVE” by Sara Bareilles.  While I have not seen the movie, I do love the song.  It starts out:

You can be amazing
You can turn a phrase into a weapon or a drug
You can be the outcast
Or be the backlash of somebody’s lack of love
Or you can start speaking up
Nothing’s gonna hurt you the way words do
And they settle ‘neathy your skin
Kept on the inside and no sunlight
Sometimes a shadow wins
But I wonder what would happen if you
(now the chorus)
Say what you wanna say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be brave

BRAVE.  I used to define bravery as taking action in the face of life threatening danger.  Police officers, firefighters, and soldiers are brave but now I realize I was wrong.  Without diminishing these examples of bravery, it is only fair to acknowledge that bravery includes a far larger group of people. Continue reading

Singlehood of The Traveling (Hiking) Pants

Singlehood of The Traveling (Hiking) Pants2015-08-23 09.35.44It’s September and I love this month for so many reasons but especially because it is a month of transition.  I am still transitioning even though it’s been a year since the “Un-divorce” became final —  final.  To celebrate the next chapter of my independent life, I gifted myself a two week SOLO adventure to Peru– my first time in South America!  I have to admit that I am quite proud of myself for possessing the courage to get away without a traveling companion.  As a result, I feel stronger both mentally and physically.

Now why Peru of all places?  I have been fortunate to visit places like The Great Wall of China, The Pyramids in Egypt and Angor Wat in Cambodia so I was anxious to explore the ancient Incan ruins of Machu Picchu.  More importantly, I was ready to explore myself — take a deep turn inward by creating the space necessary to get in touch with my Soul and clear out the clutter!  Plus there is something delicious about being “anonymous” in a foreign country that deepens my sense of adventure.  Plus — plus, Latin men are “muy caliente”! (“Meow,” said the cougar!) Continue reading